Posted on by Rj

We all have to fight our wars ourselves!

Estimated Reading Time: 4 mins

Yes! Who else do we expect to fight for us?

Our friends? Soulmate? Or our family? They can contribute too. But, no matter how many times someone demonstrates us, how to do something we fear about, at the end of the day, unless we decide, that it is time to pick our weapons and jump in the mess, nothing else can help much.

This concept is as simple as this. Whenever we are enduring an injury, our family friends, and lover will feel sad and empathetic towards our grief. But it is us, who has to bear that pain at the end of the day. They can share our sorrow and motivate us, but they cannot feel our pain, no matter how hard they try to do so.

We all fear something, and we try to find ways to justify that fear, but fear remains fatal until we stare it in eyes and face it. Yes, it is easier said than done, but the question is, do we have any other alternative? I think we all know the right answer.

I used to like a girl in my graduation days, who was committed to some other guy. But we used to talk a lot. Not a very uncommon setup, when someone is physically present with you, and emotionally with someone else.

So, one day she was telling me something about the difficulties they are facing in their relationship, though I never liked to listen to their love tales, I was lending my ears, as a loyal friend and silent lover.

I used to think that guy as an asshole, I know that’s bad, but I am also a human, right? But he said a very nice thing to her, and I still remember it even after almost 7 years. We should appreciate good thoughts, even if they are coming from people, we don’t like.

He said, “We never know, how strong we are unless we have no other choice than to be strong.”

True!

They broke up later, by the way.

We all fight different wars on different fronts, things we are cribbing and concerns about might not what our acquaintances are worried about. We all have different needs and desires. Let’s look into an example which we all can relate to.

So, we all know money is the root of many quarrels and issues around us. But, how does money come to existence? Earlier, people use to exchange commodities in exchange for other commodities they need. 

For example, Imagine, we are farmers and grow lots of mangoes and we want to buy a car.

So, we will go to the car dealer and offer him lots of fresh and juicy mangoes in exchange for a car, but he doesn’t want mangoes, instead, he wants a divorce. And, if he goes to a lawyer and offers a car in exchange of divorce, there could be a case that the lawyer doesn’t need a car, instead, he wants to have heart surgery.

Now, my point is that we all are seeking different things, things which I am seeking in my life might very well differ from the things you want from your life. Which left you and me alone in our respective pursuits. 

Our pursuit will offer us different struggles and hurdles. My struggle will be different from what’s yours. Hence, it is only us, who can do anything about our problems. People can guide us, motivate us, and empathize with us. But they can never fight our wars for us, it is our job to do so.

I know the above example might be very difficult to comprehend and understand, but I want to emphasize on a very simple fact, that the reason behind why we have to fight our wars ourselves is not that people don’t want to fight with us, but the simple fact, that they are already occupied in their affairs. Hence, it is us and us only, who can do anything about the things we are concerned about.

Let’s keep a smile, pick our weapons and take a decision, that it is only us who can do anything about our issues and not anyone else. Let’s decide to take our first step towards our goal alone. I know it takes lots of courage and confidence to walk alone, but courage and confidence are just the state of mind and nothing else.

If we think about our qualities and accomplishments, we will feel confident, and if we think about our weaknesses and failures, we are surely going to feel under-confident. Same is the case with courage, if we are confident that we can win, we will surely act courageously. *Just mind games.

Believing is a half battle won! So, believe in it and most importantly in yourself.

I feel, that if all the good things happened with us are because of us, then trust me we all have it in us, to make it till the end. All we need is to be confident, persistent and believe.

Again, I am not a master psychologist, but just an observer. And, I feel these things can help, I may not be perfectly right, but I am damn sure, I am not completely wrong as well. 

It is for us to decide.

~R

17 Replies to “We all have to fight our wars ourselves!”

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